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Archive for October 3rd, 2012

Bobblespeak translations, 1st presidential debate

Posted by Charles II on October 3, 2012

Jim Lehrer: Thanks to the so-called Commission on Presidential Debates, an Anheuser Busch-run front to foster pretend-debates, the candidates will be presenting their best focus group-tested word salads.

We will limit the salad composition to US-related stuff delivered in what are supposed to be two minute segments which will become Clint Eastwood style ramblings thanks to my incapacity as a moderator. After segments supposedly about the economy, healthcare, and government, but instead dealing with whatever the candidates want to talk about, there will be two minutes or whatever the candidates decide for closing statements or whatever.

If an audience member makes any noise, he or she will be on the next plane to Guantanamo. However, you are required to express your approval that these two corporate-approved candidates will deign to pretend to represent you.

What are the major differences between the two of you about how you would go about creating new jobs?

Obama: I want you to know that I love my wife and am skipping out on our 20th anniversary to prove to her and all Americans that I’m willing to suffer too.

Back before me, someone really screwed things up. I’d say it was the Republicans, but that might sound partisan. Thank God the American people are desperate enough to keep running the hamster wheel rather than rioting in the streets like the Greeks.

The auto industry has recovered even if wages are way down and 5 million low-wage jobs have been created to employ teachers and firefighters laid off to satisfy the Austerian god. Mitt says that if we give money to the richies and let corporations run the joint, all will be well.

I have a different view. I want to adopt Mitt’s basic platform, but be nicer to small businesses and spend a little money on education. Also, we really could save some money if we stopped spending it all on blowing things up and killing people.

So, do you want to vote for George W. Bush II or the man who continued his policies?

Romney: I’m glad to hear you love me more than Michelle, Barry. This is obviously a very tender topic.

People keep coming up to me and my wife and asking if we can help, and of course the answer is no because we have to protect our hundreds of millions, but elect us and something good will happen someday.

My plan has five basic parts. North American energy independence, which will create four million jobs in Canada and leave us in thrall to Ottawa instead of Mecca. Second, do something to make Mexicans buy our stuff. Maybe send gunboats to Tampico or something. Third, do something to China when they cheat, like call them harsh names or threaten to close Wal-Mart. Next, eliminate government. Fifth, more money to billion-dollar a year businesses, which are technically called “small,” in the same sense that someone with herpes technically doesn’t have a sexually transmitted disease because you could get it by French kissing.

Small businesses create all the jobs. I know because I spent my entire career snuffing them out.

Barry believes that government is necessary, whereas we all know that corporations run things like schools and hospitals and jails better.

Lehrer: So, are you a big government tax-and-spend liberal, Mr. President?

Obama: I’m not going to respond because I want to talk about education. We’ve adopted Republican ideas on testing and merit pay and union-busting in what I call Race to the Top and 46 states have bought into it. Now I want to hire a hundred thousand teachers except the Republicans have already cut about three times that number, which means I only want to cut 200,000 teachers.

I’m also willing to adopt Mitt’s plan for corporate tax rates but I want to preserve loopholes for manufacturing and also bribe companies to stay here instead of to go overseas.

And I’ll adopt Mitt’s plan to drill baby drill, but I’d like to spend a few billion on solar and wind.

Also austerity and/or tax cuts. Now, I want austerity and some tax cuts, while Mitt wants austerity and tax cuts measured only in oodles

[This is as far as I got. It really was remarkable for its evasions by the candidates and ineffectual noises by the moderator.]

Posted in 2012, Barack Obama, Mitt Romney | Comments Off on Bobblespeak translations, 1st presidential debate

The basic debate factcheck

Posted by Charles II on October 3, 2012

Romneycat reviews the debate

All from NYT:

Catherine Rampell: Mr. Romney promised to create 12 million jobs over the next four years if he is elected president. That is actually about as many jobs as the economy is already expected to create, according to some economic forecasters.

Robert Pear [fact check FAIL]: Listing his objections to the new health care law, Mr. Romney said: “It puts in place an unelected board that’s going to tell people, ultimately, what kind of treatments they can have. I don’t like that idea.” [Pear fails to point out that the Board cannot act without the assent of Congress, meaning that this is a lie, and that if people have the money to pay for it, of course they can get treatment, so a double lie].

Richard Perez-Pena: “I’m not going to cut education funding,” including grants for college, Mr. Romney said…. The governor’s position paper on education says he would “refocus Pell Grants dollars on the students who need them most,” suggesting that fewer people would qualify. Democrats also interpret the budget plan of his running mate, Representative Paul D. Ryan, to mean a steep cut in the size of the program.

Catherine Rampell [fact check FAIL]: Mr. Romney said repeatedly that Massachusetts has the top-ranked schools in the country.

Using data from the National Assessment of Educational Progress, a large national standardized test, The Daily Beast ranked Massachusetts at the top. [but what connection is there between that and Romney policies as governor?]

John Broder: A number of readers, including Patty Freeman-Lynde from Athens, asked about Mr. Romney’s charge that half the companies invested in under the president’s green energy stimulus have gone out of business.

That is a gross overstatement. Of nearly three dozen recipients of loans under the Department of Energy’s loan guarantee program, only three are currently in bankruptcy, although several others are facing financial difficulties.

Trip Gabriel: Mr. Romney rejected the charge. “I’m not going to cut education funding,” he said. “I don’t have a plan to cut education funding.”

But in the past Mr. Romney has said he would do just that.

Richard Perez Pena: Mr. Obama said of his opponent that “when he tells a student you should borrow money from your parents to go to college,” it calls into question whether Mr. Romney realizes that some people “don’t have that option.” [but maybe Romney was referring to borrowing money to start a business, which certainly resonates with the majority of American families who do not have the money to start a business].

Robert Pear [fact check FAIL]: Mr. Romney said in the debate that Mr. Obama’s health care overhaul would allow the federal government to “take over health care,” an assertion rejected by the president.

The 2010 health care law clearly expands the role of the federal government. But it also builds on the foundation of private health insurance, providing subsidies for millions of low- and moderate-income people to buy private insurance.[Pear manages not to state that Robamneycare is clearly not a “take-over”]

Annie Lowrey: Mr. Romney argued that Dodd-Frank, Mr. Obama’s financial regulatory reform law, designated certain financial firms as “too big to fail,” giving them a “blank check” and implicit government backing.

The law does designate some financial institutions as “systemically important.” But it also puts them under significant additional regulatory scrutiny and requires them to write “living wills,” telling the government how to unwind them.

Michael Cooper: Repealing Mr. Obama’s health care law, which Mr. Romney said he would do, would actually increase the federal deficit.[unstated: this refutes the Romney claim that Robamneycare adds to the deficit]

So, there you have it. Romney will get a bounce because he gained stature simply by standing on the stage with the President and not coming off as a complete ass.

But he’s still a lying schmuck, and his policies cannot save this country.

Meanwhile, better fact checkers, please. Also, a debate moderator would help.

Posted in Barack Obama, Mitt Romney | Comments Off on The basic debate factcheck

Fire David Gregory

Posted by Charles II on October 3, 2012

Because he’s pretending to be a journalist, while being a suckup.

I am watching the Warren-Brown debate, moderated by David Gregory.

Sign here.

(This is not an endorsement of Change.Org. If you know of another way to protest David Gregory, I’m open)

Posted in Uncategorized | 4 Comments »

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